The Killer Whale, the Shark and the Dolphin
by Levi Ackerman
Summary: "I wonder what our relationship would be classified as," Makoto murmured. "We are husbands and Rin is our mistress," Haru replied immediately. "What the hell?" Rin rolled over, attempting to punch Haru, but Haru caught his wrists, blue eyes glinting with mischief. "Haru-chan," Makoto scolded gently, arms wrapping around Rin from behind. "Don't be mean." MakoHaruRin threesome smut


_Disclaimer: I don't own Free! Wish I had a Makoto though. _

_A/N: I'm obsessed with Makoto and I thought MakoHaru was my OTP but then I read some amazing MakoRin and got pulled onto that ship too. And RinHaru is really hot too. Eventually, I got sick of having to divide my loyalties and figured, you know what, fuck it, I'm shipping all of them. In couples. And also a big happy threesome because that way, everyone gets something. _

_I ended up writing this. It's way too long and probably should have been broken up into 3-4 chapters, but I couldn't figure out how to break it up because after the first half there is really no 'plot' as such, just a lot of glimpses and snapshots into the MakoHaruRin relationship. And I'm really short on time and figured that if I didn't just publish it all now I would never end up getting to publishing it. _

_I hope you enjoy this catharsis of my MakoHaruRin feels. It's kind of chronological, but that doesn't even matter. It's my attempt and smut and fluff and crack all piled into one! Please review and let me know what you think!_

**_Warning: __Rated M for explicit scenes, dialogues and references, all of a sexual nature. Contains MakoHaru, MakoRin and HaruRin (not necessarily in that order and please note that the names do not reflect topping preferences) as well as Makoto x Haruka x Rin threesome._**

**_Also, it's from Rin's perspective for most parts so expect a lot of rampant fangasming about Makoto and Haru, hee hee._**

**_Spoiler Alert: Contains spoilers for up till episode 3 of Free! Eternal Summer_**

* * *

**The Killer Whale, the Shark and the Dolphin**

* * *

**the one where they talk about who started it **

When they talked about it once - lounging in Haru's sweat-soaked bed, too exhausted to move and perfectly content to lie there entangled in one another, the sufficiently defiled cotton sheets draped strategically to cover anything indecent - they, or rather Haru, decided that it was Rin who started it.

"I did not!" Rin insisted, and Haru found a pillow sailing in his direction, Rin's choice of punishment for the earlier accusation.

He batted it aside and it fell on Makoto's bare chest. "Hey," Makoto whined half-heartedly, too tired to even push it away. He had middled after all, and middling was the most demanding position, especially considering that all three of them, with all of their swimming practice, had ridiculously high stamina.

"You were getting jealous," Haru said matter-of-factly. "You wanted in."

Rin wondered for a moment if Haru meant it as an innuendo but then decided that the ebony-haired teen was too straightforward to try something like that. "I wasn't fucking jealous," Rin fumed. "If anything, I was sick and tired of you two acting more enamored than a pair of fucking newlyweds! Midnight beach runs in matching boyfriend jackets - "

"You're just sad you weren't invited - "

"Matching fucking lunch boxes and water bottles - "

"Makoto's mother is a very good cook - "

"You won him goddamn _goldfish,_ Haru_ - "_

_"_You're just pissed because none of them were named after you - "

"I don't want a stupid _fish _named after me- "

"Buy Makoto a pet shark, I'm sure he'll be happy to christen it Rin - "

"You act like you're some knight in shining spandex and lycra armor every time it's dark or we go to a slightly secluded place - "

"Makoto gets very frightened, and as his friend - "

"_Boyfriend," _Rin corrected. "Boyfriend, lover, fuckbuddy - " Makoto flinched at that word, but didn't deign to contribute to the conversation. " - even but don't say you'll were ever just friends Haru."

"We were at a point," Haru said thoughtfully. "Maybe when we were younger."

"You mean, like, twelve?" Rin snorted. "Hell, even then you two were like a creepy, tiny couple - "

"And you were jealous - "

"I was not!" Rin ploughed on, ticking things off of his fingers. "You're capable of winning a race at prefecturals and the pool is your second home, yet you can't even bloody climb out of it by yourself - "

"...Makoto has nice hands." Haru blushed at this one, and Rin rolled his eyes.

"Don't get me started on all the double dates at the pool - "

"That was club practice. Rei and Nagisa were there too."

"Exactly. Do you know _how _fifth-wheeled Gou used to feel? She used to whine about it to me, like I gave a flying fuck - "

"Jealous," Haru repeated. "You were jealous. Even if Makoto and I were - kind of unofficial - that doesn't mean you weren't jealous."

"I wasn't!" Rin's voice took on a higher note, and he looked petulantly at Makoto. "Makoto, _tell _him something."

Makoto's green eyes were sparkling as he flashed Rin that flutter-inducing sunny smile of his that made everything in the world seem alright again.

"Sorry Rin, but I have to agree with Haru on this one," he said. "I think you may have been just a little bit jealous..."

Rin pouted, and Makoto, ever the pacifier, quickly added - "Not that you ever needed to be."

He winked then, and the effect was devastating. Rin forgot his earlier argument with Haru - and Makoto, technically, who had taken Haru's side - and leaned forwards, baring his sharp teeth.

"Yeah? Prove it," he murmured, and Makoto obliged.

Rin's eyes fluttered shut as Makoto's lips slid against his, a warm hand cupping the back of his neck as strong fingers kneaded his head.

Haru watched them quietly for a few moments, before shoving Rin off, his blue eyes filled with an unusual expression - that kind of lustful wanting he got when he saw a body of water he badly wanted to immerse himself in.

"The fuck - " Rin began, but Haru leaned over Makoto, and even Rin's heart skipped a beat at the intensity of their locked gazes, sapphire gazing into emerald.

"I want a kiss from Makoto too," Haru murmured, and soon enough, their lips were locked, Haru straddling the taller boy's waist.

The sight of Haru's toned thighs pressing into Makoto's toned side, the sight of Haru's fingers skirting across Makoto's hipbones that just barely peeked out of the sheets, the sight of Makoto's strong hands sliding across Haru's lower back and downwards - was too much for Rin.

Not to mention, Haru had, as he periodically did, provoked his competitive side.

Haru glared at him out of beautiful, lash-fringed eyes as Rin's next push had him on the floor. Rin smirked back, shaking strands of hair out of his face as he moved to clamber onto Makoto. "Too slow, Nanase," Rin purred, grinding his hips into Makoto - it was a testament that the two of them had exhausted Makoto today, as despite his gentleness, the larger boy was never usually so docile. "You lose. Again."

"You don't want to challenge me," Haru's eyes flash. "Not when it comes to him."

But Rin very much did want to challenge Haru, especially loving how his rival/best-friend's eyes narrowed, simmering with intensity. It made him harden even more, as if Makoto's thumb tracing circles around his hipbone as they ground against one another wasn't already enough to drive him crazy.

"Don't fight, you two," Makoto chastised as Haru slid back onto the bed.

"He started it."

"I was only stating the truth."

"You can shove that truth up your - "

"Why don't you kiss and make up?"

Makoto's lighthearted suggestion was all it took, and then seconds later, Rin and Haru were tangled together on the bed, erections raging, seemingly engaged in a competition to see who could choke the other with his own tongue first.

Makoto watched them and smiled, trying to ignore the hardness in his pants that came from watching his two best friends make out. Not for long though. Soon enough, Rin's hand had grabbed his crotch and was massaging it, and Haru was pulling him down for a kiss.

_Round three, _Makoto thought in his head. Judging by the latest tally, it was Haru's turn to middle this time.

* * *

Haru had been correct in his assessment that Rin had been the one who had initiated the whole thing. Haru and Makoto, though completely shameless when it came to acting like a married couple in public, had been extremely shy when it came to the more - R-rated things.

They had kissed a few times - in the pool, on Haru's bed, on the beach under the silvery moonlight as the waves lapped against their feet - but they had generally behaved, as Rin once crudely worded it, "like a pair of fucking virgins".

Which Haru claimed was an oxymoron because virgins don't fuck, but then Rin had scowled at him and said that that was irrelevant and that Haru was missing the point.

Haru and Makoto had both fully enjoyed whatever kissing experience they did share with one another. Usually the kisses were sweet, as they melted into one another's mouths, lips sliding against one another slowly, gently, until one of them, usually Haru, would nip at the other's lips. There was tongue involved too, yes, but it had never quite reached the frenzied, desperate level that preceded sex. One of them - Makoto more often than Haru - would pull away before that, flushed red and decidedly embarrassed about the sudden rush of blood to a certain body part.

Most people thought that Makoto was the dominating one, but at that time, it had been Haru who wanted to take it further, and Makoto who had resisted temptation.

It wasn't like Makoto didn't want it - oh no, not at all. The teen had jacked off to several Haru-related fantasies in the shower, and in his bed on the rare nights he wasn't cuddling with the star of said fantasies - he was just too shy, and too much of a gentlemen. And he thought Haru didn't want it; and though Makoto was an expert on all things Haru, that was one place where he had been thoroughly mistaken.

* * *

**the one where rin catches haru **

Rin stared at the sight ahead of him, a part of brain urging him to look away, and another part, the one which usually spoke in a voice annoyingly resemblant of Nagisa, telling him that 'oh fuck, Rin-chan, now there's a new sight that you did not expect to see!'

Because it was - and Rin desperately tried thinking of un-sexy things, like that disturbing video about tentacle porn that Nagisa had showed him or those hideous butterfly-patterned speedos Nagisa owned (on second thought, why were most of the stock images in his 'Boner Control Collection' inexplicably linked to Nagisa? He really needed to stop spending so much time in the blonde's company) - to calm himself down, but to no avail.

Because the sight in front of him was the most erotic thing Rin had seen in his entire life, up to that point. Up to that point because, unbeknownst to Rin, a few weeks later and he would be treated to the sight of a furious, shirtless, wet Makoto threatening a slightly-intimidated-but-also-slightly-impressed Sousuke for threatening Haru - and well - that would likewise prove to be superb masturbation material.

Speaking of masturbation material, Haru was quite the picture himself. Rin couldn't actually _see _what he was doing - curse the shower walls for being opaque! - but his normally composed face was unusually flushed, his dark blue eyes half-lidded and clouded over, his breaths coming out short and ragged.

Rin desperately wished he could see Haru's hand pumping, but he couldn't, and had to refrain from touching himself - and then suddenly Haru let out a slight moan, and then a word - a breathy, soft word, but it was unmistakeable what Haru had said, and Rin really shouldn't have been so surprised.

"Makoto..."

Rin couldn't stop himself. "Not getting any, huh?"

Haru whirled around, and it was a testament to how gifted he was at controlling his facial expressions. The blue eyes widened a fraction, but other than that, his face was a blank slate, aside from the slight flush from his activities just moments before.

"What are you doing here?"

"I _was _going to have a shower, but I'm reconsidering it now that I know you've defiled the bathroom with your sick activities. Does Makoto know that you're jacking off to him?"

Haru had the decency to look a tiny bit ashamed, just for a moment. Rin raised an eyebrow, snickering. "He doesn't? Aren't you two fucking?"

"We're _dating,_" Haru corrected.

"Fine, dating." Rin rolled his eyes. "But everyone knows that when two guys are dating, what they're actually doing is fucking."

Haru looked away pointedly, and Rin stared at him, gaping. "Wait - wait you mean you've - you've not actually - " He couldn't complete his sentence, and burst out laughing.

"Don't laugh," Haru said balefully, stepping out of the shower, and Rin had to avert his eyes, flushing, as Haru reached for a towel.

"Why the hell not?" he demanded. "How could you possibly resist him, Haru? Those eyes, the puppy-dog face..."

"I can't." Haru sounded almost disappointed; it was just a trace, but Rin picked it up immediately.

"Wait, _what? Makoto _is the one rejecting _you?!" _It sounded too surreal to be true. But then again, knowing Makoto and the saint that he was, Rin suspected that he had some ridiculous notion about 'no sex until marriage'.

Haru said nothing, and Rin snorted. "And here I thought _you'd _be the asexual cold one..."

But then again, he thought, Haru was _extremely _passionate and forward when it came to things he liked - namely water, and Makoto. Rin wouldn't have been surprised if Haru had just suddenly stripped, like the God that he was, baring his amazing body in all it's naked glory - and then Makoto would have flushed adorably, and covered his eyes and... why the _fuck _was he fantasizing about Haru stripping for Makoto and why the _fuck _was it reawakening his not-quite-dead-before boner?

"What's the problem, Haru-_chan_? Makoto not into you enough?"

"He doesn't seem ready and I don't want to pressurize him - "

"Stop trying to be so chaste, Haru, it doesn't suit you. You're not a little angel like Makoto - "

"I wouldn't do something against his wishes - "

"You were jacking off to him - "

"And I don't think he wants me _that _way quite yet."

"Please, Haru, have you fucking seen yourself? Nobody could resist themselves from wanting you." Rin regretted it the moment he said it.

_Shit shit shit shit shit. _

Haru's eyes bore into his, and a slender eyebrow rose. "Including you?"

"Why - why the fuck would you ask that?!" Rin spluttered. "Fucking weirdo!"

Haru shrugged. "Your tone seemed to imply that - "

"You're delusional!" Rin cried, fighting down a blush, and wondering how he could turn this to his advantage. It hit him, and he allowed a lazy smirk to pull at his lips, his voice teasing when he spoke. "_Unless, _that is... you want me to think that way about you?"

Haru's eyebrows knitted together and he stared at Rin, demanding an expression. Rin grinned, holding his gaze. "Do you ever think about me when you jack off?"

Haru seemed to be to shocked by Rin's audacious implication and Rin took the opportunity to continue his taunting - besides, he had already fucked up whatever dysfunctional relationship he had with Haru from the moment he submitted to the whims of the Nagisa-ish part of his mind and deliberately looked on while Haru wanked in the shower - so no point backing down now. If Rin was going to fuck something up, he'd do a bloody devastatingly good job of it.

Rin took a step towards Haru, and trailed his finger over the boy's collarbone and down his (hard defined muscular perfect!) chest. Haru didn't even flinch, though Rin thought that his own heart would beat its way to an aneurysm, and his brain immediately produced a ridiculously cheesy line about water, and how it conducts electricity, and Haru loved the water, and that's why touching him felt so - electric? Yes? No. It sounded terrible even in his head, and Rin would rather allow Gou dating rights to Mikoshiba than say such a thing.

(He would say it to Makoto, a few months later, and Makoto would stare at him out of wide green eyes for a few seconds. And then his eyes would crinkle and the air would be filled with Makoto's laughter, and Rin would flush deeply and bury his head in his hands out of shame. But secretly, he would be happy, because Makoto's laugh was the best sound in the world, and even if it was mortifying, it was Makoto, and Rin knew that Makoto would genuinely appreciate any pick-up line that Rin threw his way, no matter how creepy or lame, and would never even think to make fun of him. Haru, however, would probably snort and make a snide dig at the quality of Rin's flirting skills, or worse ignore him altogether and pretend he hadn't said anything, which was Haru's preferred reaction to things he didn't like.)

So Rin didn't say it then. Instead, he said something ten times worse.

"You know... if you have any unfulfilled needs with Makoto... you can always come train with me instead..." For a few seconds, Rin was quite proud that he managed to pull off such a terrible line in such a suave manner, voice cool and controlled, accompanied by his trademark smirk and casual hand-through-his-hair.

Moments later, this notion was shattered and taken over by the desire to drown himself in the Samezuka pool because _what the fuck did he just suggest to Haru _and the idea of Makoto's crushed, hurt expression if he ever came to know of Rin's proposed debauchery was unbearable in itself because _nobody makes Makoto sad_.

Rin flailed for a few moments as Haru stared him down, and wondered if he could play on Haru's hydrophilic tendencies and pass the 'unfulfilled needs' bit off as an invitation to have a freestyle race - but then Haru spoke, voice low, and dark eyes boring into Rin's.

"Thanks for the offer, but I would never cheat on Makoto."

It felt like a punch in the gut, and Rin had never felt more idiotic in his life - but then, as Haru left the shower room - Rin could _swear _the the black-haired boy had deliberately brushed against him, so that just for a few seconds, the naked skin of their arms and shoulders had touched.

And then Rin's evil, cunning, utterly Nagisa-like mind presented him the irresistible image of Haru, soaking wet, looking as effortlessly beautiful as he always did when surrounded with water, whether it was in the pool or simply taking a shower, stroking himself to completion. His cheeks were flushed, his lips slightly parted, the rivulets of water streaking down his skin like the fingers of some overexcited porn star... and Rin wondered if he would ever be able to elicit such an expression on Haru's face. He thought of Haru, lying under him as Rin pleasured him, the usually emotionless facade broken, his cheeks red with want and his usually solemn eyes painted dark with desire and want... and he would breathe out _his _name as he came. _Rin, Rin, Rin, _Haru's voice echoed in his mind.

But then Rin's name turned into Makoto's, and Rin's mind conjured an image of Makoto, shirtless, his large hands pumping and Haru while Haru writhed and begged beneath him crying _please Makoto, touch me Makoto, fuck me Makoto_ and - _"_Fuck." Rin cursed, before swiping a finger against his lip. He'd bitten down so hard that he had drawn blood.

He wiped it away angrily before slamming the shower door behind him, wrenching the tap to adjust the temperature. Even the icy cold jet of water wasn't enough to calm his raging libido.

He jerked off then - in the same shower that Haru had been jerking off in earlier. His latest salacious fantasy featured not one, but _two _of his best friends, in a position that though Rin knew they hadn't ever been in before, would make even the virtuous Makoto hard if he knew what Rin was imaging.

* * *

**the one where makoto is just too fucking sexy without having to try**

Rin convinced himself that he was doing it to help Haru. He was going to flirt with Makoto to help Haru. Rin reconsidered the train of thought that he had used to convince himself that this was actually an acceptable and logical plan.

Haru, by the looks of his recent and most _wonderful _display in the shower room - which was permanently etched into Rin's mind and was the new top hit of his private masturbation fantasies (indeed, if his brain had award ceremonies, 'Jacking off in the shower' featuring Nanase Haruka would have unanimously won the 'top pornographic film featuring solo actor' category) - was horny. And wanted - no, _needed _sex.

And Rin, as his (eager potential sex friend) kind-hearted and generous friend was going to make sure he got it. From Makoto.

Hence the plan to flirt with Makoto. And hit on Makoto. And get a little handsy with Makoto. And tease him and fluster him _just _enough so that he was acceptably turned on, at which point Rin would _nobly _sacrifice his own libido and concede the chance of getting boned by Makoto, and _gracefully _exit so that Haru could enter and face the wrath of Makoto's sexual excitement instead.

Rin was just _too _good of a friend. Haru really needed to suck his cock - NO - _thank him graciously _for his efforts is what he meant.

Yes. It was all for Haru. It had nothing to do with the fact that Makoto was devastatingly gorgeous, and had the most amazing, soul-searching eyes, that lit up and crinkled cutely when he smiled his perfect smile of rainbows and unicorns that was enough to turn even Rin's frigid heart into a melted gushing mush of whatever magic it was that Makoto managed to inflict upon everything he was in the vicinity of.

It was for Haru. It had absolutely no connection to Makoto's fantastic back muscles which Rin badly wanted to run his hands over, or the way Makoto's pectorals clenched when he stretched... or the way his abs rippled and the way his biceps flexed as he slid his shirt off in one fluid motion - and damn, maybe he _did _deserve to beat Rin in that muscle contest, and _no, _Rin was _not _jealous, only admirative.

But yes. Back to Makoto. No. Back to Haru. It was for Haru. Haru's sake. Rin was being a _good _friend, for Haru's sake. And technically, Makoto would benefit too, in the end. So he was actually helping both of them out.

They really should thank him. Or fuck him. Or thank him, preferably by way of double-fucking. (Haru under him taking Rin in his ass and Rin being fucked by Makoto and _no _he had not thought of the scenario before or anything!)

But yeah, it wasn't like Rin had _ulterior motives_, he was just trying to help out to of his friends, for which he totally deserved a fuck of gratitude. No, show of gratitude was what he totally meant to say and the Nagisa-voice - which seemed to be gaining dominance and had recently usurped whatever rationality he had in his mind - really need to _shut the hell up. _

Makoto was still at the far side of the pool, which was good, because Rin wasn't quite ready to face him just yet, not when his mind was following a rather lascivious train of thought, or rather LOLtrain of thought... (and damn, _that _was a really bad joke right there)

Seducing Makoto would be a delicate task, one which required precision and patience. Overkill would lead to Makoto being scared off like a frightened rabbit, but if he was too subtle, Makoto, who was the King of Optimism and Thinking the Best of Everyone, would brush it off as mere friendliness. No, he had to strike a balance. Makoto's genuine loyalty and virtue was also another issue.

Rin needed to turn him on till exactly the right _level _- the level at which his horniness would just about override his exuberant morality and virtue or whatever magical ability Makoto possessed because Rin was _certain _it was magic, nobody else could be that nice or self-controlled. Haru had implied that he had tried, and Rin didn't know how it was possible for anyone - that too someone as crazy about Haru as Makoto - to exercise self-restraint when _Haru _was trying to get into their pants.

And oh shit, calm the fuck down Rin, because here's Makoto.

Unlike Haru, Makoto was perfectly capable of removing himself from the pool by himself. Rin watched in fascination as Makoto pushed himself out with his arms (biceps biceps biceps!) and stood up in one fluid motion, water streaming down his sculpted body. Between Haru and Makoto, Rin was getting really jealous of water, which really was _not _normal.

Makoto's eyes then lit up as he caught sight of Rin, and he smiled that earth-shattering smile - Rin was positive that there was a cure for every disease plaguing the world in that smile - before tilting his head in a ridiculously cute way.

"Rin! What's up?" His voice was warm, smooth.

And then he reached up, raking a large hand through his wet hair, pushing it out of his face - and wow. Just. Wow. It wasn't pornographic, but Nanase Haruka's Shower Scene had some tough competition right there, and all Makoto had done was push his hair back in a way that was so natural, but so sexy, that it should have been illegal.

But that was Makoto's problem, one which even Haruka faced. They both exuded that effortless sexiness. Then again, Rin had been told that he possessed that quality as well. Which is why it probably made sense for all three of them to bang. Nevermind.

Banging though. Haru and Makoto banging. That was why he was here in the first place, at Iwatobi fucking swim practice.

"Hey, Makoto." Rin had to struggle slightly to keep his cool facade, because it was so difficult not to smile back at Makoto when he smiled at you like you were the best thing in the world. "Can we talk? Alone?"

Makoto look puzzled, but nodded. "Sure. What's up?"

They headed towards the locker rooms, Rin feeling slightly smug as he glanced over at Haru out of the corner of his eye, and saw that Haru - who was floating in the pool so that just his eyes were above the waterline - was indeed tracking his and Makoto's movements intently.

"It's about Sousuke," Rin said finally, and Makoto gulped, recalling the incident.

_" - and stay the fuck away from Rin - " Sousuke growled, and Haru took a step backwards as Sousuke advanced on him. Rin was about to rush ahead and intervene, yell at Sousuke for being such a giant dickhead - but someone else beat him to it. _

_"Excuse me?" Makoto's voice held a chill, and his face was colder than Rin had ever seen it in his life. His form was tense, rigid, lined with anger, as he walked towards Sousuke and Haru. _

_"You're Makoto Tachibana," Sousuke drawled. "I remember you. Backstroke, right?"_

_"That's right," Makoto said politely, but the lack of usual warmth in his tone was terrifying. If anything, his calmness made it all the more intimidating, and Rin had never seen such anger in his eyes. _

_He didn't think Makoto was even capable of feeling, or expressing something like anger._

_Haru was gazing at him in awe as well, as Makoto protectively stepped in front of his best friend. "I'm not actually aware who you are," he said, his voice dangerously soft. "But I'll have to warn you, if I see you unnecessarily threatening Haru again... there will be consequences."_

_Even Sousuke looked slightly thrown off-kilter by this. Makoto did have a great physique and Rin could practically see Sousuke's brain calculating which of the two would come off better in a fist fight. Rin heaved a sigh of relief as Sousuke gave a harsh laugh, backing down; he really didn't want to have to pick sides here, and Sousuke wouldn't take it well if he chose Makoto and Haru over him - again._

_"I didn't take you as the type to come rushing to the defense of your boyfriend," Sousuke scoffed. "But I don't want to fight."_

_"Neither do I," Makoto said calmly, though his green eyes were burning with rage. "Leave Haru alone and I'll forget this ever happened."_

_"Fine. I stand by words though," Sousuke replied, looking over Makoto's shoulder to glare at Haru. "Stick to Tachibana, he's more than enough for you."_

_Rin didn't have the time to ponder what the fuck that his last statement had meant, as he was forced to duck behind a locker as Sousuke walked off. He felt almost like an intruder, hearing the next bit between Haru and Makoto - tender words, a kiss - but he didn't know what to make of the entire situation. _

_In fact, there was only one certainty which he had learned from it, and that he was sure of: Seeing Makoto pissed-off had been a huge fucking turn-on. _

"Ah - you know about that?" Makoto scratched his head, looking sheepish. "I didn't mean to come out so - strong. It's just - he was threatening Haru, and I'm sorry but - "

"Don't start apologizing." Rin cut him off with an eye-roll. "He was being an ass, and you set him straight. Nothing wrong with that."

"Is he angry with me?"

"I dunno..."

"Isn't he the one who told you about this in the first place?"

Rin slapped himself mentally - of course, Makoto wasn't supposed to know that he had _seen _the entire thing firsthand.

"Yeah. Yeah, he did," Rin lied immediately, temporarily distracted as Makoto chewed on his lip worriedly. _Fuck, he has nice lips. __And a really well-defined jaw too. _

"Did he seem upset?"

"I - I dunno. Wasn't really paying attention." _Really chiseled. I want to lick it. _

_"_He must have said something?"

"Nah, he doesn't talk much. Just mentioned it." _Haru's got the whole high cheekbones thing going for him, but Makoto's jawline, damn..._

"Oh. Okay. Do you think I should say - "

"_Don't _apologize," Rin snapped at him.

"Alright," Makoto agreed. "Is that all you wanted to talk about?"

"What, I'm not Haru so I'm not allowed to want to talk to you alone now?" Rin was teasing, but it had the intended effect on Makoto, who immediately looked guilty.

"No, no, of course not! I just wasn't expecting it, that's all!" He smiled again, and Rin's stomach turned somersaults. "What's up?"

"You really got pissed off at Sousuke though, right?"

"Well, he was really out of line with how he treated Haru - "

"I would have liked to see that." Rin took a step closer to Makoto.

"H-huh?"

"You, pissed off. I would have liked to see that." Rin raised a hand, cupping Makoto's hard, firm shoulder (holy shit, the guy had great deltoids) and brushing his finger against the slightly damp skin.

"I - I'm sure it was no big deal - " Makoto said, giving a nervous laugh.

"You would have looked quite hot, I can imagine," Rin murmured, taking another step, and trailing his fingers down Makoto's arm to rest on his bicep. He could feel the muscles clenching under his hand, and it was an exhilarating feeling.

Makoto scrunched his nose cutely. "Are you feeling okay? You're not normally so... nice."

_Really? Me hitting on you is considered niceness, Makoto? _Rin tried not to roll his eyes; trust Makoto to somehow react to a pick-up line with well-intended concern towards the person trying to hit on him. He'd have to turn it up a notch.

"Honestly, you could probably take Sousuke in a fight. You're stronger."

"How do you know?" Makoto genuinely seemed curious.

Rin placed his hands on Makoto's hips. "Look at your muscles. It's obvious," he practically purred, a part of him turned on by the warm firmness under his fingers, and another part of him mortified by what he was doing.

Finally, it seemed to click in Makoto's unassuming and overly nice head that there was something _wrong _in Rin's 'niceness', and that it wasn't of the general benevolent variety that Makoto was wont to believe all people possessed. Pink dusted across his cheeks, and Rin couldn't help but think, _finally. _

"Um - what are you doing?" Makoto asked carefully, and Rin figured he would play on Makoto's politeness because Makoto considered him a friend, and would be too considerate to hurt his feelings by pushing him off right away.

"Just admiring your abs," Rin murmured, trailing his fingers up Makoto's stomach, tracing the contours and ridges and _wow that felt good _and _must not get a boner right now _and _I wonder what Haru's expression would be like if he saw me now. _

"Ah ha ha. Um, thanks." Makoto was watching him uncertainly, the green eyes fixated on Rin, and Rin couldn't bear to meet his gaze. He felt like Makoto would know then, that Makoto would realize the terrible thing he was trying to do - and wait, why was it terrible now? Wasn't he doing this for Haru's sake, and Makoto's own?

Bolstered by that belief, Rin continued his attempted seduction, though he was already too entranced by Makoto's closeness. He could feel Makoto's warm breath, smell the unique scent of him - summery, fresh, with a whiff of chlorine - and he wondered, for a moment, his eyes flicking to Makoto's lips, what the brunette would taste like.

"I don't resent you for winning that muscle contest," Rin went on, his knee brushing Makoto's hard thigh - the tight material of his swimsuit accentuated Makoto's muscular legs perfectly. "You're so fucking sexy but you don't even realize it."

Makoto was blushing now, and also looked slightly terrified, but Rin was too lust-ridden by then to care. His foot grazed Makoto's calves, and naturally, those were rock hard too. _I wonder if he's just as hard down there... _

Unthinking, captivated, entranced, Rin let his fingers hook under the waistband of Makoto's swimsuit and _finally _it appeared to hit Makoto that he was being seduced.

Rin felt warm hands on his shoulders, and he instinctively leaned in, but Makoto cleared his throat, pushing him back gently.

"Rin, um, what exactly are you trying to do?" He looked so confused, so _surprised, _and Rin found his unwillingness to accept his attempts even more of a turn on.

"Isn't it obvious?" Rin murmured huskily.

"Rin, I don't - "

"Stop trying to pretend you're a little saint, Makoto," Rin breathed. "I know you're actually just a teenage boy with raging hormones and needs just like the rest of us..."

"Rin..." Makoto's eyes grew wide.

"You're just holding back around Haru because you're scared aren't you?"

Makoto was shaking slightly. "Rin, I - "

"Your life doesn't have to revolve around pleasing Haru, you know? I could take care of you too, in ways that you can't imagine even in your wildest fantasies. I bet I would be better than him too, at making you feel good."

And he damn well would. Haru was a selfish brat who took up all of Makoto's time and attention. It just wasn't fair. Rin, however, would lavish just as much attention upon Makoto and his godlike body and his probably equally godlike dick - okay, _wrong line of thought. _

"Ah - Rin?" Makoto's face flushed scarlet. "You might want to, um..." Makoto trailed off, still too considerate of Rin's ego to say it bluntly, but he was too transparent. His discomfort was now evident, and Rin realized with growing horror that his boner was pressed right against Makoto's leg.

Releasing him as if burned, Rin jumped a step back, hissing. "Fuck!"

"I - it's okay," Makoto said hurriedly, trying to meet Rin's eyes in spite of his blush. "It's only natural, everyone - um - what I mean to say is - uh - "

"I'll see you later!" Rin yelped, rushing out of the shower rooms, feeling utterly mortified.

So much for that... in the process of seducing Makoto, Rin had somehow ended up getting seduced himself. Given that Makoto really hadn't been doing _anything, _it was entirely unfair.

To make things worse, he bumped into Haru, who apparently was capable of exiting pools on his own. Haru gazed at him knowingly and then smirked.

"What?" Rin growled, not in the mood to entertain Haru's maddening propensity for being cryptic.

"You tried pulling the same stunt on Makoto, didn't you?"

"The fuck are you talking about?"

"Didn't work, I see."

"Stop babbling."

"Makoto's too nice. And too attractive for his own good," Haru added as an afterthought.

"If you're done wasting my time with stupid comments, I'll be going."

"Don't fuck with him, Rin." Haru's tone was dark, cutting, menacing almost. "He's _mine._"

The timely arrival of one hurricane Nagisa spared Rin from having to face Haru further. Was it weird that a pissed-off, possessive Haru also did funny things to his lower regions, even if the anger was directed at him? As he sped off towards Samezuka, Rin wondered, for a moment, at Haru's tone, and at his voice.

He'd surely sounded jealous. But of whom?

* * *

**the one where makoto cockblocks himself **

Matsuoka Rin was not one to give up. When he set his eyes on a goal, he fuckingachieved it. Whether that involved going to Australia and training under world-class coaches to beat Nanase Haruka in a race... or whether it involved going to extreme lengths to get a threesome between himself, Haru and Makoto to happen.

Because it was a fucking good idea and fucking should happen. And because Haru had been the cause of a lot of unwanted hard-ons at very inconvenient moments (plus mini-Mikoshiba was a bastard who cracked worse sex jokes than his brother, and was it really necessary to make snarky comments about how if Rin swam backstroke, his 'shark fin' would cut through the water alright, that too in front of Nitori Ai of all people). And because Makoto, similarly, had been the cause of a lot of ruined sheets, and laundry was expensive, damnit, plus he hated seeing Nitori's face every morning and his stupid expression of 'I know something I shouldn't but I won't dare to say it because I'm too terrified that you'll kick my ass'.

At first, his aim had been to get Haru and Makoto to fuck. That didn't seem to be going well. Rin had seen proof with his own eyes, just the other day -

_Sometimes Rin really hated the new Iwatobi/Samezuka joint training schedule nonsense that Makato had proposed, and he had been unable to refuse. Because of course, like all other mortals, Rin wasn't immune to Makoto's hopeful eyes and big shiny smile which made the concept of refusing anything to Makoto seem intuitively wrong. _

_But joint training meant that Makoto and Haru swam in Samezuka, which meant a lot more 'shark fins' for Rin to deal with. But worse than that, it meant that he had to walk in on the two of them making out in the locker room, which only added fuel to the fire of his raging sexual crush on them. _

_Makoto had Haru trapped against the wall - and damn, what Rin wouldn't do to be entrapped by Makoto like that - and his hands were resting firmly on Haru's hips. Haru's hands were looped around Makoto's neck, proving Rin's theory about how, despite the fact Makoto fretted over Haru like a wife, when it came to the bed and all things sexual, Makoto was actually the man in the relationship... at the very least, it lent some credence to Rin's 'Makoto x Haru' fantasies. _

_Because of course Makoto topped. Or would top. If they ever did it. _

_And then Haru's hands moved down from Makoto's neck to his chest, and then his stomach, and though a part of Rin was wildly jealous, another part of him was urging Haru on, cheering him ahead. And then when Haru slipped his hands into Makoto's swimsuit, Rin had to bite back a gasp. _

_Makoto, however, hesitated, breaking the kiss, and then gently prying Haru's hands away. _

_"Haru - "_

_"You're hard," Haru murmured. "Let me take care of you."_

_"You - you don't have to Haru - " Makoto gasped at Haru nipped at his neck, before looking at him imploringly._

_"It'll feel really good, I promise." Another attempt to get into Makoto's pants, literally, but Makoto took Haru's hands and threaded their fingers together against the wall. _

_"It - it's really okay, Haru."_

_"But - "_

_"Just relax, okay." Makoto kissed his way down Haru's chest. "We don't need to rush things."_

_Rin wanted to punch them both. Mainly Makoto, for being such a fucking martyr. Doesn't he realize he's being his own damn cockblock?!_

_And Haru too, for giving up so easily. Haru knew Makoto. If Rin could read Makoto, Haru - who apparently could communicate telepathically with the boy - should be able to read him too. _

_Makoto wanted Haru, Rin could see that much. Makoto wanted Haru to give him at least a handjob, that much Rin could guarantee. He didn't know about blowjob because maybe Makoto was one of those types who would find it too demeaning to force his beloved into such a position - all bullshit, to Rin. _

_But then again, typical Makoto-style, Makoto had probably convinced himself that Haru was too good for him or some similarly idiotic shit, and that making Haru do dirty things to him would be wrong and a sin. Makoto clearly didn't see that Haru was a dirty, sinful boy, who wanted no more than for Makoto to let him have his dirty, sinful way with him. And probably vice-versa. But no, Makoto would never look at it that way. He was a sweetheart, but he was also an idiot. _

_Rin pitied Haru, for a moment. It must have been frustrating. Though he marveled at Makoto's self-esteem, because damn it, the tone of Haru's voice and the look in his eyes (as much of it as Rin had been able to see from his hiding spot) would have been enough to coax him into coming, hard. He wondered what it would be like to have Haru trying to convince him for sex... not that Haru would have to convince much... _

_It was aggravating, seeing all their wasted sexual energy. Rin knew that he needed to do something about it. He needed them to fuck. He needed to see them fuck - only for proof that his plan had worked, no voyeuristic pleasure intended at all... _

And in a roundabout way, he had come to the conclusion that the only way to get the two to do this, was to involve himself. Hence the threesome idea.

He'd only join them once, to start things off. Then he'd give them their privacy, and never bother them again.

Or twice.

Or you know, if _they _wanted it, not like he'd suggest it - they could turn it into a biweekly thing. Or daily. Rin was open minded that way.

But yes. Threesome it was, and Rin thought it was a lot more direct as a goal. More challenging, perhaps, but more direct. He liked it.

* * *

**the one with the killer whale**

On hindsight though, it was probably a stupid idea to go for Makoto first. Because, of course, Makoto was an angel. And Rin already feel like he was committing the most treacherous sort of blasphemy by attempting to corrupt someone as pure and innocent as Makoto.

But he was also smoking hot and Rin really want to have Makoto on top of him, _just once, _so he could run his fingers shamelessly down that sexy, toned back while Makoto pounded into him... and it wouldn't be fair to let someone as pretty as Haru just sit there and _watch, _so yes. Threesome it was.

* * *

Naturally, it would end this way. Rin cursed himself, and his raging hormones.

Because for a second time in a week, he had found himself, pressed against Makoto (not that _this _was a problem) with his 'great white shark' (a much better name than Mikoshiba's damned 'shark fin' and no, he didn't think of it himself) pressed against Makoto's firm stomach.

And fuck Makoto for not even having to try, but somehow turning the tables of all of Rin's grand seduction schemes against him.

"Um - Rin - could you please get off?" Makoto's voice was shaking slightly, and Rin could tell he was trying very hard to maintain his usual calm politeness.

"I didn't do that on purpose," Rin grumbled into Makoto's chest. "I slipped on the puddle."

"I - I know that," Makoto said kindly. "But - um - it'd still be nice if you could get off me, please?"

"I'm making such an idiot of myself, aren't I?" Rin sighed, deciding to give up. Makoto was too straightforward, and too innocent. He felt like the devil.

"Rin, please don't feel bad!" Makoto entreated, and Rin's heart fluttered weirdly.

"It's your fault," Rin grumbled. "Nobody should be allowed to be so sexy. It should be illegal. _You _should be illegal."

"You exaggerate," Makoto muttered, though he was flushing. Rin liked it, so he told him.

"I like that look on you. When you blush."

"Stop it, please," Makoto said, and then their eyes met, and Rin regretted everything instantly.

Besides, he'd poked Makoto enough, though with abs of steel like that, Makoto probably hadn't noticed. Or he had, and was being a gentleman and not saying anything about it so that Rin could preserve whatever shreds of dignity he had left. Yep, probably the latter.

Rin sighed in resignation, and shifted himself slightly so that he would be able to stand up with at least a semblance of grace after this debacle when -

"Get off!" Makoto cried, sounding terrified.

"I am. What the hell is up with you? Geez."

"Quickly, please."

"God, don't act like I'm fucking toxic," Rin spat, glaring at him. "Just because you and Haru are both so damn perfect - "

"Can we have this conversation standing?" Makoto's voice was strained, and his hands were at Rin's waist, trying to push him off. Annoyed, and ego bruised sufficiently, Rin changed his mind, and decided to stay there stubbornly, clamping his legs around Makoto's waist.

"You probably think I'm the biggest lech ever - "

"I don't think that at all!" Makoto was panicking and Rin wondered why. He turned around for a moment, but there was no sign of Haru. "Rin, please - "

"You aren't into me, I get it already, stop fucking rubbing it in - "

"It's nothing like that - "

"As fucked up as this sounds, this entire thing started as result of me actually wanting to help you - "

"Rin..."

"- maybe to stop acting like such a fucking _nun _so you and Haru could get on with your relationship already and - damnit, Makoto, _what _is your problem - _oh."_

Rin's words died in his mouth, his heart hammering in his chest. Because that had to be it.

Makoto's 'killer whale' was pressing right up against his 'great white shark'. And damn, it was big.

A huge, self-satisfied smirk spread across his face, and Makoto refused to meet his eyes at first. Rin grabbed his chin though, forcing him to. Makoto's green eyes were churning with emotion, but at that moment, Rin couldn't quite decipher his feelings.

"Please get off, Rin," Makoto said evenly. Rin realized that there was a possibly that he was getting pissed off - but coupled with the fact that their erections were so close to pressing together - this only edged Rin on.

"Or what? You'll get mad? Spank me? Go right ahead, baby." Rin bucked his hips forward, but was stopped by Makoto's firm hands.

"Don't do this."

"Why not? You want me to, don't you? I can feel it, you know..." Rin leaned down, flicking out his tongue to trace along the curve of Makoto's ear, and something within Makoto seemed to snap.

Moments later, Rin found _himself _on the floor, with Makoto hovering over him. His green eyes were hard, like shards of emerald.

"Ma - Makoto?"

Makoto glared at him for a moment, and Rin was caught between being terrified and even more turned on. And then Makoto's face softened, though his voice was still firm, devoid of its usual warmth.

"I - I'm really sorry, Rin. I hate having to do this. But Haru - I can't - " And then suddenly, he was gone, and Rin felt like the worse person in the world.

_I really should have tried Haru first._

* * *

**the one where rin convinces haru**

Rin was surprised when Haru was the one who approached him first. It was just a text, to meet him at the Samezuka pool, at midnight.

"How the fuck do you manage to sneak in every time?!" Rin demanded, seeing that Haru was already inside the water, floating calmly on his back.

"Makoto told me what you did," was Haru's stoic reply.

Rin gulped. Of course, the ever-loyal Makoto _would _go and tell everything to Haru. Makoto wasn't the kind to lie or hide things from his precious boyfriend.

Rin tore off his shirt and trackpants; expecting a race, he had been wearing his swimsuit underneath.

"So I guess he also told you about how he got a hard-on just by me rubbing against him?" Rin didn't even bother hiding the smugness in his tone.

"He did, actually."

Though Rin had expected Makoto to tell on him, Rin had _not _expected for Makoto to reveal even those details - details which could very well anger and hurt his precious Haru, since they related to something that was - kind of - Makoto's fault too. If he hadn't been so patient and nice, he could have shoved Rin off before things had reached that level, instead of entreating and pleading nicely.

Rin wondered if he should feel more guilty about using Makoto's kind nature to his advantage.

"So I guess it was a shock for you, huh? Your darling Makoto isn't as loyal and goody goody as you think he is?"

"He's loyal," Haru said, immediately jumping to Makoto's defense. "He's just too nice. You took advantage of his niceness."

"Sure, I took advantage of his niceness," Rin scoffed. "He was pretty much lying there, _letting _me grind against him. He _enjoyed _it."

"Of course he did," Haru said, so matter-of-factly that Rin nearly fell into the pool. "He's into men, and you're a really attractive one."

Rin was taken aback by that answer, but attributed it to Haru's usual weirdness, picking up instead on the last part of the comment. Rin kept his tone playful, flirtatious. "So you _do _think I'm attractive, huh?"

"I told you this once, and I'm telling you again. Stop. Trying. To. Mess. With. Makoto."

Haru's voice was frightening as he glided towards to edge of the pool, and Rin found himself backing away. Despite all the analogies everyone made, at that moment, Rin felt more like Haru was the shark, cold and angry, coming straight at him.

For one thing, Rin definitely was a lot less enthusiastic about going into the water now. It was Haru's natural territory after all; he would be a lot more dangerous in it.

_What the fuck am I thinking? It's Haru, he's not homicidal... is he?_

If there was anything Haru would kill for, Rin decided, it was Makoto. And he didn't want to die. Rin looked over at Haru, who was now leaning over the edge of the pool. There was still a weirdly predatory gleam in his eye, and for a moment Rin thought it looked like Haru wanted to eat him. Not that Rin would mind _that, _no, anything which involved Haru's mouth or teeth on him would be _quite _nice.

"Get your mind out of the gutter."

"What the fuck?!" Rin spluttered.

Haru looked at his crotch pointedly, and Rin flushed magenta at being caught; Haru had picked the wrong time to turn so perceptive, though it's not like it had been sticking out or anything, it was just starting to get hard. "What is wrong with you Haru, you don't just fucking - "

"Makoto's mine. I won't let you have him."

Rin nearly jumped out of his swimsuit. When had Haru managed to get out of the pool and creep up behind him like that. Trying to keep a joking tone, he turned around to face him. "I'm not trying to steal him from you, you possessive freak. But maybe you could just share..."

Haru looked genuinely confused at this. "What does that mean? He's _my _boyfriend."

For all the dumbfuckery he had committed recently, Rin felt that this was actually the least stupid time to say what was really on his mind. "Ever thought of having a threesome?"

Haru paused, and seem to consider this new proposal. "Threesome?"

"Yeah, threesome. I'm sure dolphins do it," Rin added, before realizing it was a rather pathetic attempt at persuasion.

"Rin, _please, _I have watched way more dolphin documentaries than you have," Haru said condescendingly.

"Back to the topic though," Rin said, a little nervously. "Threesome."

"With Makoto?"

"No, with Nagisa." Rin rolled his eyes.

Haru blanched. "Why would you even _suggest _that - "

"It was _sarcasm, _Haru - "

"_Bad _sarcasm, Rin," Haru mimicked his tone, and Rin felt himself heating up. This is why he liked arguing with Haru so much... it always kept him on the edge, always kept him feeling unusually riled up.

"So anyways... Makoto..." Rin trailed off, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes. You want to copulate with Makoto."

Rin nearly facepalmed at that. "Can you not refer to it as - _copulating_," he bit out, voice slightly choked.

"Why not?"

"It's just - it's just -" Rin struggled for words. Then - "I guess, in Rei's words, it's not a very _beautiful _way of putting it. And sex is a beautiful, beautiful thing."

"How would you know? You've never had it."

"How the hell can you just assume that?!"

"Alright. Have you had sex?" Haru's tone was like that of a math teacher asking an annoyingly difficult problem an expecting the correct answer straight away. It made Rin want to punch him.

"Well?" Haru prodded. "Have you?"

"N - no!"

"I was correct."

"Whatever! This is off topic! We were talking about a threesome, right?"

"A threesome with Makoto."

"Yes, Haru."

"I don't see how this benefits me though."

"What?!"

"I don't see how a threesome would benefit me." Getting no reply for Rin, Haru clarified. "I already get Makoto all to myself. Why would I want to share him with you? Besides, Makoto may not even agree to this."

"Scared of some competition, huh, Haru?" Rin taunted. "Scared that if we do have a threesome, Makoto will be more into me than into you?"

"Rin." Haru's voice had a warning edge.

"Scared that I'll be able to pleasure him better than you - "

"_Rin_," Haru practically growled, and Rin was secretly thrilled, because never had Haru been frustrated enough to sound like _that, _and hell yes, it was sexy as fuck.

Rin grabbed Haru's shoulders and jerked him forwards, until their noses were touching and Rin could feel Haru's breath against his lips.

"You'll get something out of it too, you know," Rin murmured, running his fingernails lightly across Haru's chest, feeling the other quiver slightly at his touch.

"What's that?"

"Me."

"..."

"It isn't just about Makoto for me, you know," Rin murmured. "If anything, from the start, for me, everything has revolved around _you, _Haru."

"..."

Rin bought his lips to Haru's neck, flicking his tongue out and tasting the chlorine. Haru shuddered beneath him. "Rin, don't - "

"I want you, Haru," Rin mumbled against his skin, as his fingers brushed the insides of Haru's wrists, before threading through Haru's own. "I've always wanted you, and I can tell that you want me too. We have chemistry, everyone knows it, and even Makoto wouldn't try to deny it."

Rin could sense that Haru was giving in, but mentioning Makoto's name was probably a mistake, because seconds after it had slipped out of his mouth, Rin found himself flying through the air - courtesy of a hard shove from Haru - until he landed into the pool with an ungraceful splash.

"The hell?!" Rin resurfaced, spluttering, but Haru had dove in the pool by then and was on him, backing him up against the tile wall.

Rin and Haru stared at each other from behind their dripping bangs, both breathing heavily. Haru's face was inscrutable at that moment, and Rin hated him for it. Still, they were so close, and they were in the pool, and Haru loved the pool as much as he loved Makoto (foursome with Makoto and pool occurred to Rin as a mildly convincing argument but he couldn't bring himself to say something like that, even if it was to Haru) so Rin thought he'd give it a shot.

"Fuck me," he whispered, though his voice was harsh, his eyes never leaving Haru. "Fuck me, right here, right now, in this pool. Or let me be the one fucking you."

There was a long silence, and then - "I still don't think Makoto will agree to it."

Rin gaped at Haru, before he realized that the bastard was _smirking _at him.

"He thinks he's being really noble by stopping me. It's kind of annoying," Haru admitted.

"Would he really be able to resist the both of us at once though?" Rin murmured, daring to rest his hands on Haru's hips underneath the water.

Haru's eyes darkened as they met Rin's. "Probably not."

Rin looked at him expectantly. "So..."

"I'll agree to it," Haru said finally. "But only if..."

"Only if what?" Rin asked, trying not to sound too excited.

"We do it in the pool."

It hit Rin then that perhaps the 'foursome with pool and Makoto' idea may have actually been the right line of reasoning to use on Haru, but he didn't dwell on that for long.

"You know... if we're planning to seduce Makoto, we have to be really good, yeah?"

"What are you getting at, Rin?"

Rin leaned in, momentarily nibbling at Haru's bottom lip with his teeth, before pulling back again. Their eyes met, and Rin thought he would come just from the intensity of Haru's gaze... but that would be _such _a waste, especially when he was finally close to getting what he had wanted all along. "Practice with me?"

Haru didn't answer, but somehow, a second later, their lips had crashed together, and their hands were entangled in one another's hair, and they had flipped places so that Rin was the one pushing Haru against the pool wall, and Haru's legs were wrapped tightly around Rin's waist.

* * *

**the one where they seduce makoto**

Makoto was surprised when Haru called him to Samezuka of all places, at 10 pm on a Friday night. The pool shut at 8, and if Haru had really wanted a nighttime swim, the Iwatobi pool was closer, and easier to break into.

_Must be something to do with Rin, _Makoto thought, as he biked towards Samezuka, capitulating to Haru's wishes as he always did.

"Haru-chan?" he called softly once he'd reached the pool. The water was shimmering under the moonlight that filtered through the glass ceiling. Makoto smiled to himself as he spotted Haru, floating on his back in the middle of the pool, looking almost asleep.

"Makoto," Haru greeted, flipping over and slicing through the water. Makoto admired his form – Haru didn't even have to try it, but he was just so naturally _beautiful. _

"Get in the water, Makoto."

Makoto raised an eyebrow. "What, _now_? Why?"

"Just do it. For me."

And Makoto couldn't refuse him after _that_.

Chuckling, he stripped out of his clothes – he had worn his swimsuit underneath his jeans, expecting something like this – and slid into the water. Haru paddled towards him, before standing up straight and kissing him. They kissed for a while, and Makoto could taste the faint chlorine on Haru's lips.

Makoto wrapped his arms around Haru's waist and Haru pushed him backwards towards the wall. Makoto gasped, breaking the kiss, when instead of cold, hard tiling, he found himself backed up against something warmer, softer – yet firm, and undeniably _human._

"Hey."

Makoto didn't need to turn around to recognize Rin's sultry voice, as a pair of perfectly muscled arms came to wrap around him.

"R-rin!" Makoto gasped, nearly jumping out of the water in shock, but Rin and Haru both had a strong hold on him. Makoto's panicked green eyes met Haru's calm blue ones. "Haru?! What's going on?"

"Calm down, Makoto," Haru murmured, cupping Makoto's face with his hands, the pads of his thumbs brushing against Makoto's cheekbones. "It'll be okay."

"But – but – Rin – " Makoto broke off with a gasp, as Rin trailed his hands over Makoto's abs, his 'great white shark' which Makoto had just recently familiarized himself with – digging into Makoto's backside.

"Don't worry about him," Haru told Makoto firmly, before leaning in for another kiss.

"Yeah, Makoto." Rin bit down on his earlobe. "Don't worry about me."

* * *

"Ahh!" Makoto cried, green eyes flying open, and he struggled in Haru's grip. "What – "

"It's okay," Rin murmured into his neck, as he cupped Makoto's length in his hands, Makoto's skin hot against his own; Makoto had been so distracted by Haru that he had barely felt Rin slip his hands into his swimsuit.

Rin squeezed, and Makoto let out a groan. "Good job, Rin," Haru muttered, though Rin thought he sensed a tone of jealousy.

_Ha, _Rin thought triumphantly, _I got to touch him there before you did, Haru. _He continued fondling Makoto, but his triumph was short-lived, as Haru's hand soon slipped into Makoto's swimsuit as well, nudging Rin's aside.

"H-Haru-chan!"

From the sound of his voice, Rin thought that Makoto was going to have a seizure.

"Calm down," Haru said soothingly, rubbing at him. "Just let us take care of you this time, okay?"

"Besides, this is just the beginning," Rin warned Makoto, his other hand finding and squeezing Makoto's fine, hard ass. "You're _fucked _tonight, Mako-chan."

* * *

Operation: Seduce Makoto, had turned out to be a tremendous success.

"We really defiled that pool," Haru said dejectedly, scrunching his nose. "We shouldn't have."

"It was _your_ bright idea to do it in a pool!" Rin shot back. "Don't blame me!"

"It was worth it, I supose. But we have swim practice in there tomorrow…"

"I messed around with the filters a bit, it'll be _fine_ by tomorrow, Haru."

"…so you mean we can use it again?"

"I don't mind," Rin grinned devilishly, looking over at Makoto, who was collapsed on his bed, a rather dreamy expression on his face. "Up for a round two sometime later this week, Makoto?"

Makoto looked over at him, brown bangs falling over his eyes, and Rin was immediately overcome by an urge to push them out of his face; he couldn't do that yet though. They were all still purely sexual, and he didn't want to start doing stupid, romantic things and seem like a weirdo. He wasn't even quite sure what Makoto's take on this entire thing was.

Makoto had been willing enough an hour ago in the pool - _more _than willing, actually. Rin's ass still hurt and he was pretty sure he had Makoto's finger-marks permanently imprinted onto his hips, not that he minded. He had been right, being dominated by Tachibana Makoto had been a _heavenly _experience, though Rin had also gotten quite a thrill from riding him.

Still, he wasn't sure whether Makoto would be up for doing it all again.

Makoto stared at him for a long moment - and then something in his gaze shifted, in a way that made Rin blush all over. "Sure, why not."

* * *

**the one where rin has too many feels **

It was Makoto who said it one night, immediately alleviating whatever unspoken worries had been nagging at Rin's heart, fears and insecurities that he hadn't even dared to face or ask himself. It had been two months since they'd started this entire thing, and though they'd messed around fairly frequently, Rin still wasn't sure where they stood. In fact, he was entirely unsure about his position in the unofficial marriage that was Makoto and Haru's relationship. But then Makoto said it, and his voice was like warm sunshine, pouring all over the darkness in Rin's heart.

"You know you're not just some - third wheel - or person we call to mess around with when we're bored, right?"

"Wh-what do you mean?" Rin didn't dare hope, as he turned on his pillow so that he was facing Makoto. Makoto's gaze was tender as he lifted a hand to brush the backs of fingers over Rin's cheek, before tracing his jawline.

"You're a part of this now." It was Haru who spoke this time, sliding under the blankets and snuggling up to Rin's other side. Rin was shocked: though sweetness and knowing what to say and when was a part of Makoto's personality, Haru had never been the verbally expressive type. "A part of us."

"You always will be," Makoto added.

They said it so simply, but with such sincerity, and Rin felt tears welling up in his eyes.

"Haru, he's crying," Makoto said, his tone gentle and teasing, his eyes - still locked with Rin's - twinkling.

"I'm not. Shut up Makoto," Rin sniffed, his heart was leaping and somersaulting like an Olympic-level diver.

"Rin, don't be a crybaby," Haru chastised, and Rin kicked him under the sheets, which soon evolved in a game of footsie under the covers.

Makoto's arm wrapped around him, and Rin snuggled into Makoto's chest, as Haru spooned him from the back. Rin loved being in the middle.

They all did, but Rin and Haru were the only two who actively fought for the center position, as Makoto was usually kind enough to resort to sleeping on the side when they shared a bed, so that either Rin or Haru would get the middle. This counteractively resulted in Makoto sleeping in the middle about half the time, since both Rin and Haru - with their propensity to turn everything in the competition - were both loathe to give him up, and also less disinclined to relinquish their prized position to Makoto than one another.

Once Rin wondered aloud if Makoto was deliberately stepping back and taking advantage of Rin and Haru's competitive natures, but Haru immediately stomped on this theory, claiming that Makoto would never be that manipulative or cunning.

"I wonder what our relationship would be classified as..." Makoto murmured. Rin didn't say anything, content to let Makoto hold him in his strong arms and stroke his back with just the _right _amount of softness in his touch. It was Haru who responded, rather quickly as well.

"We are husbands and Rin is our mistress."

"What the fuck?" Rin rolled over, attempting to punch Haru, but Haru caught his wrists in time, blue eyes glinting mischievously.

"Now, now, Haru-chan, don't be rude," Makoto scolded gently, arms wrapping around Rin from the back now. "Rin's not a girl. What's the male form of mistress?"

"Makoto?!" Rin cried, feeling betrayed.

Haru grinned devilishly, and Rin had to admit, it was a rare expression for Haru to make, but it looked extremely attractive on him.

"I don't know, Makoto. How about boytoy?"

"Haru!" Rin pouted. "Makoto, you _said _I'm not a person who you call around just to fuck with."

"Permanent boytoy then," Haru amended, in a tone which implied that he actually believed that this was a perfectly reasonable compromise. "Permanent live-in boytoy."

"Haru," Rin growled threateningly.

"Permanent live-in _irreplaceable _boytoy," Makoto added, laughter coloring his voice, and Rin marveled at his ability to somehow turn even 'boytoy' into something that made Rin feel warm and fuzzy on the inside, but that was Makoto for you.

"You're both being mean," Rin sulked, blushing as Makoto and Haru both laughed. He did love it when they laughed, even if it was at him once in a while. "And I'm _not _your boytoy."

But then when Makoto spoke next, his voice was low and velvety, his breath hot on Rin's ear. "Haru-chan. I think Rin's feeling a bit upset..."

"Troublesome," Haru scoffed, flicking Rin's nose. "Don't sulk. We were only joking. Here, we'll even cheer you up."

And then Haru leaned down to suck at his neck, and Makoto's teeth were scraping against his ear... and Haru's hand slid up his shirt and Makoto's hand slipped under his boxers, and Rin melted into their ministrations.

Sometimes he liked to keep a tough front, liked to be the one controlling things... but today, he knew, was one of those times when he would just be content (more like fucking ecstatic) to lie there and let them touch him and caress him and eventually coax him into coming.

Rin milked those moments for all they were worth, because really, Haru and Makoto were a devastating combination, and Haru and Makoto doing wonderful thing to your body with their hands and teeth and lips... Rin thought it was a miracle that he hadn't just _died _out of sheer pleasure.

* * *

**the one with the group chat**

New Group

Mako7 created the group.

Nanase Haruka joined.

R!n joined.

R!n changed the group name to 'Underwater Fuckfest ヽ(*ω*)ノ'

Nanase Haruka: Rin, that's obscene.

R!n: u suck -_-

Nanase Haruka changed the group name to 'Nanase x 2 + boytoy'

R!n: wtf haru no

R!n: screw u

Mako7: Hahaha ^^

Nanase Haruka: See, Makoto agrees with me

Mako7: =)

Mako7: Sorry, Rin =p

R!n: makotos basically admitting hes the girl

Mako7 changed the group name to 'Tachibana'

Mako7 changed the group name to 'Tachibana-Nanase'

Mako7: My family group has the same name, it would be awkward if I mixed them up

Nanase Haruka: I was about to tell you to change it.

R!n: How the fuck does he know?

Mako7: He's in it =))

Nanase Haruka: I'm in it.

R!n: ofc... -_-

R!n: hey if were married I want my name in too

Nanase Haruka: No.

Mako7 changed the group name to 'Tachibana-Nanase-Matsuoka'

Mako7: Happy? =)

R!n: thats a boring name

R!n changed the group name to 'The Killer Whale, the Shark and the Dolphin'

Mako7: I kind of really like that one =D

Nanase Haruka changed the group name to 'MakoHaruRin'

R!n: the fuck

R!n: thats so cheesy

R!n: and why am I bottom? i wanna middle

R!n changed the group name to 'MakoRinHaru'

Nanase Haruka changed the group name to 'HaruMakoRin'

Mako7: Hahaha guys... 6(^^)

Nanase Haruka: Just so you know, it's my turn to middle first tonight.

R!n: dibs on first top and second middle

Mako7: ...guys, I'm trying to concentrate in class, please don't talk about these things (o.o)

Nanase Haruka: His face is all red now. It's funny.

Mako7: Haru! Stop trying to feel up my leg!

R!n: wtf you two are NOT allowed to flirt on this group chat when im fucking sitting in samezuka and ur right next to one another

R!n: not fucking fair T^T

Nanase Haruka: Sucks to be you.

Mako7: We miss you! Wish you were here! (^3^)~* -3

R!n: awwwwww makochannnn -3 -3 -3

Nanase Haruka: You are both being weird. Stop it.

R!n: awww haru-chans jealous! heres some love for you too -3 -3 -3

Mako7: -3 -3 -3 -3 -3

R!n: why does haru get so many more hearts than me makoto huh?

Nanase Haruka: He clearly likes me more =3

Mako7: ...Haru-chan used an emoticon O_o

R!n: dieee T^T

Mako7: Rin -3 -3 -3 -3 -3

* * *

(private chat)

Nanase Haruke: Makoto, I want more hearts.

Mako7: I love you, silly. -3 -3 -3 -3 -3 -3 -3 -3 -3 -3

* * *

**the one where haru only swims free **

HaruMakoRin

R!n: guys they have individual medley events prefecturals!

Mako7: I heard about that too! Are you going to take part?

R!n: ofc I am, I specialize in two of the four, and why not take the chance to improve on breast and back?

Mako7: I can help you out on your back =)

R!n: im sure you can, baby ;)

Mako7: ...I didn't mean it like that 6(^^;;)

Mako7: Haru-chan? What about you?

R!n: its obvious isnt it

R!n: ill answer for him

R!n: he only swims free

Nanase Haruka: I only swim free

R!n: told u...

Mako7: Haha, you guys are so cute =)))

R!n: makoto are you gonna do it?

Mako7: I might give it a shot! (^o^)9

Nanase Haruka: Really? Both of you will be against each other?

Mako7: Still don't want to, Haru? Imagine, the three of us in adjoining lanes =))

Nanase Haruka: I only swim free...

R!n: tbh given the amount of kinky shit weve done in the pool i dont think i could concentrate on my race if you were both in adjoining lanes just btw

Mako7: Heh 6(^^)

R!n: sometimes i wonder if haru only swims free cause he cant swim any of the other fucking strokes

Nanase Haruka: Excuse me, what?

Mako7: Careful, Rin-chan, he might start challenging you to butterfly now =P

R!n: thank god hes not this anal about sex though

R!n: imagine if we wanted to experiment with different sex positions

R!n: and haru was like

R!n: i only do missionary

R!n: or i only do bottom

R!n: that would suck

Mako7: Hahahahahahahaha

Nanase Haruka: ...

R!n: IKR

R!n: LOL

Mako7: I'm dying =D =D =D

Nanase Haruka: ...

Mako7: Haru, we still love you -3

Nanase Haruka: If I remember correctly, last night, it was Rin who was freaking out about that new position.

Nanase Haruka: Why fix it if it's not broken, he said.

Nanase Haruka: We're fine the way we are, he said.

R!n: NATURALLY

R!n: who gave you that book on sex positions haru?

Nanase Haruka: Nagisa.

R!n: SEE MY POINT

Nanase Haruka: No.

R!n: makoto back me up here

Mako7: Hahaha I wouldn't have minded trying...

R!n: NAGISA IS DEMON SPAWN

R!n: NOTHING HE SUGGESTS IS EVER A GOOD IDEA

Nanase Haruka: So much for you and all your empty promises.

R!n: what are you talking about?

Mako7: I'll show you a sight you've never seen before, he said.

Mako7: =))

Nanase Haruka: Nice one, Makoto.

Nanase Haruka: Read my mind.

R!n: WTH I MEANT THAT ABOUT SWIMMING GUYS

R!n: dont corrupt the words I said as a child T^T

Nanase Haruka: Please, you said it to me recently in the pool and I know you meant it as an innuendo.

Nanase Haruka: I'm not that dense.

R!n: really? you acted like you didnt get it then...

Nanase Haruka: Becuase I wanted to swim and you were disturbing me.

Mako7: Besides, Rin, I think you've already shown us everything you have. There's nothing left to see, now is there? (^_^)

R!n: THE HELL?!

R!n: makoto when did you become such a bitch? harus rubbing off on you...

Makoto: Hahaha maybe =))

Nanase Haruka: Makoto, we should stop being so mean to him, he might leave us for Sousuke.

Mako7: Noooo, Rin, we love you! Don't leave us for Sousuke! -/3

R!n: WTF

R!n: SCREW YOU BOTH

Mako7: Tonight ;)

R!n: *blushing furiously*

Mako7: Hahaha =) *flying kiss*

Nanase Haruka: Good bye.

(private chat)

Mako7: You know we don't mean any of it, right? We're just teasing =))

R!n: ofc i do makoto geez im not actually upset

Mako7: That's good =) Love you! -3

R!n: stahp makoto, my heart (*_*)

* * *

**the one where they decide to piss makoto off**

"Let's piss Makoto off."

Haru raised an eyebrow. "_Why?"_

_"_Cause I think he'd be _really _hot if he was all angry."

Haru looked mildly interested now. "How so?"

"He'd be so much rougher. Not that I mind his gentleness," Rin said immediately, sensing that Haru was about to jump to the defense of Makoto's gentleness. "It's just - I kind of really have this fetish where I like getting thoroughly dominated, you know? Overpowered, kind of."

"I know," Haru said, smirking. He was well-aware of Rin's slightly masochistic tendencies, though they usually only ever played out when Rin and Haru were alone, because Makoto was too sweet for that kind of thing.

"Don't you think it would be _hot_ though? Imagine Makoto dominating you - and I don't just mean by topping - like imagine him _completely _in control, having his way with you, being super rough and violent and doing whatever the fuck he wants regardless of whether you enjoy it or not..." Rin rambled on dreamily.

"You should direct a porn movie," Haru commented, and Rin glared at him.

"Is that all you have to contribute to this genius idea of mine?" he snapped.

Haru chewed on his lip thoughtfully. "You're absolutely right," he said after a moment, looking at Rin as if he'd invented a new and ingenious way of cooking mackerel.

"Of course I am. I'm always fucking right. You two should listen to me more."

"Makoto's eyes get a shade darker when he's angry," Haru said. "I've only ever seen it once or twice, but I agree. It's really hot."

"Plus, don't you wish that he'd stop worrying about being too rough and just fuck your brains out, once in awhile?"

"I _would_ like that," Haru said, nodding. "Like hard enough that I wouldn't be able to walk properly for a week or two."

"Or swim," Rin pointed out, and Haru looked horrified at the prospect, and Rin regretted his words instantly, because now there was no way in which he would be able to rope Haru into his 'piss-off-Makoto-for-rough-angry-violent-sex' idea.

"I'm sure - I'm sure he wouldn't be _that _rough," Rin said hastily. "Makoto's too nice to inflict pain on us, even if we were asking it. And, I mean, we could always do it during winter, when the outdoor pools are all too cold."

"But Samezuka - "

" - will also be shut for two weeks for renovation."

"Even if I couldn't swim for a couple days..." Haru said thoughtfully. "For Makoto. It might be worth it."

Rin whooped, and Haru looked at him strangely. Part one of his plan was a success. Part two would be more of a problem though. Makoto's patience was as unbelievable as his kindness and optimism.

"I would feel bad manipulating him," Haru said.

"We can tell him why we did it later. It's Makoto. He'll be embarrassed, but he won't mind. He might even be flattered."

"We have to make sure we don't hurt his feelings," Haru said sagely. "Makoto is very delicate."

"He's not a fucking doll, Haru!"

"Still. I'm not going to say or do anything mean or anything that would make him sad."

"So then how else - " It hit him then, and it seemed to have hit Haru as well, as they exchanged looks.

"Of course," Haru said softly. "That could work."

Rin rubbed his hands together, a positively evil grin spreading across his face. "Guess it's time for me to give my old friend Sousuke another call."

* * *

**the one after they pissed makoto off **

(private chat)

R!n: fuck haru dont tell makoto but i had to skip practice today

R!n: maybe we should have waited till winter haha

Nanase Haruka: I'm sore and I have marks everywhere.

Nanase Haruka: Nagisa was unbearable during practice.

R!n: ugh i can imagine that little bitch

R!n: he must have made the lamest sex jokes

R!n: but how did u even manage to swim?

Nanase Haruka: I floated around and used my arms.

Nanase Haruka: Poor Makoto, he looked so guilty =(

R!n: awww, I can imagine

R!n: poor baby -3

Nanase Haruka: I think it was worth it though.

R!n: hell ya it was!

Nanase Haruka: I actually like how you think.

R!n: LOL

R!n: youre as much of a masochist as i am haruchannn

R!n: tee hee hee

Nanase Haruka: Don't call me that.

R!n: what? its only a special name mako-chan can call you by?

Nanase Haruka: Shut up.

* * *

**the one where makoto wears glasses**

Nanase Haruka: Rin, tell Makoto he's not allowed to wear glasses.

R!n: huh whyyy? they look so good on him!

Nanase Haruka: Exactly. That's the problem.

Nanase Haruka: He's attracting too much attention.

R!n: someone is jealoussss

Nanase Haruka: I don't need to be jealous, Makoto loves me the most.

R!n: OI

R!n: WTF

R!n: you dont need to rub it in

Nanase Haruka: Don't be stupid.

Nanase Haruka: You too, obviously.

R!n: why haru is that a confession you're making to me (*_*)

Nanase Haruka: Rin, I'm serious about the glasses.

R!n: I think he looks hot as fuck, and im not as possessive as you are

R!n: tell him yourself.

Nanase Haruka: Rin. I need to go swimming soon.

R!n: hahahahahahaha thats why

R!n: wanna go for a quickie in the shower? ;) ;)

R!n: why haru dont tell me you have a glasses fetish?

R!n: what would nagisa say?

Nanase Haruka: It's not like that. I'm not attracted to Rei. Just when Makoto wears them.

R!n: what if I wore them?

Nanase Haruka: ...

* * *

(private chat)

R!n: haru totes has a fetish for glasses

Mako7: Lol, really =))

R!n: yeah

Mako7: And what about you? =P

R!n: i have a makoto fetish ;)

Mako7: O_o

Mako7: =))))))

* * *

(private chat)

Mako7: Haru-chan~~~! =D

Nanase Haruka: Don't call me that.

Nanase Haruka: What's up?

Mako7: Don't you think Rin looks sexy with his new glasses? -3

Nanase Haruka: ...

* * *

**the one with the porno**

"Can you fucking believe him? That bloody Mikoshiba!" Rin was pacing around the room ranting, as Haru lounged lazily on the bed, listening, with mild amusement pulling at his lips, to his friend vent.

"What did he do now?" Makoto asked, walking out of the shower in just a towel, his hair damp, and sticking out in a hundred directions.

"He had the balls to - holy fuck, Makoto, you can't just walk out looking like that, come _here,_" Rin sat down on the bed, tugging on Makoto's wrist. Haru attached himself to Makoto almost immediately - like a fucking barnacle, Rin thought absurdly.

Then again, Haru loved Makoto and Haru loved water, so a wet, newly-showered Makoto was something Haru really couldn't resist. Not that Rin could either.

"Guys - let me - get dressed - " Makoto's voice was hoarse as Haru sucked and licked at his neck and Rin tugged insistently at his towel.

"What's the point, all your clothes are coming off anyways," Rin murmured.

"It's your own fault for walking out in a towel," Haru said severely. "You deserve the consequences."

* * *

Three hours of mind-blowing sex later, they were sprawled out on Haru's bed.

"So... what exactly did Mikoshiba do _this _time?" Makoto asked, since they hadn't actually gotten to finishing the conversation due to other, more _pressing _matters.

"Huh?" Rin, whose head was in Makoto's lap, had not quite recovered from his post-coital mush, and just stared up at Makoto adoringly. Makoto smiled at him, ruffling his hair and leaned down to drop a kiss on his forehead.

"He bought Gou a pearl necklace," Haru supplied, snuggling further into Makoto's side, and adjusting his legs over Rin's.

"That's nice of him though, isn't it?" Makoto asked. "Why are you so upset?"

"Mikoshiba breathing upsets him," Haru said, his foot running along Rin's calf.

Rin swatted at him. "You're being unusually talkative today, smartass."

"It must have been really expensive," Makoto went on. "He's getting serious, isn't he? He probably really loves her."

"Please, money is _not _a show of love." Rin snorted. "If it were... well, I would have bought you both fucking palaces of gold by now."

"Now there's a sight we've never seen," Haru quipped, and Makoto laughed warmly.

"It's okay, Rin. We don't need things like that."

"Would my palace of gold have a pool?"

"Yes, Haru, your palace of gold would have a fucking pool." Rin rolled his eyes, before straightening up suddenly. "Hey, when we're older, we should actually buy a house which has it's own pool!"

"That would cost a lot," Makoto mused.

"Oh, we'll make the money somehow," Rin said dismissively. "It's not that hard?"

"Really?"

"I'll be pulling in loads with all my Olympic victories," Rin said confidently. "And Makoto could do commercials for swimsuits or underwear or something." Rin looked at Makoto approvingly. "Yeah, that would work. Great fucking body. And face. Companies would pay you loads to have you as their brand face or whatever."

"That's not true." Makoto waved his hands, flushing. "Besides, I'm not even famous, why would anyone pay me?"

"I would buy whatever you endorse," Haru said immediately, and Makoto's eyes crinkled as he gazed at him fondly.

"Thanks, Haru-chan."

"Drop the 'chan'."

"What about Haru?" Makoto asked curiously.

"I'll be a top-class mackerel chef," Haru suggested.

"We'll put him in a museum," Rin replied. "People can pay to look at him. He's a freakshow after all."

"Rin!" Makoto sounded scandalized. "That's cruel!"

"Could I live in a pool?" Haru asked.

"Haru-chan!"

"Sure. I'll even throw in a mermaid tail. That's what you'll be. Nanase Haruka, the real-life merman."

"Okay."

"_Rin!_"

"And if it all fails, we could just make a porno or something."

"Wh-what?" Makoto spluttered.

"A sex video, you know," Rin said casually. "Wouldn't be too hard, we have sex all the time anyways. Just need to record it now and then. I'm sure we'd sell very well."

Makoto stared at him, mouth agape. Rin continued, getting a kick out of seeing Makoto so flustered. "We could advertise Makoto as our main star. His dick is of pornographic proportions anyways - "

"_Rin!" _Makoto moaned.

"See, he even makes sounds like a porn star." Rin grinned wickedly.

"Why would anyone want to buy our video?" Haru asked.

"Please, we're all attractive enough and have fucking good bodies, okay. I bet there are tons of gay men and fujoshi out there who would totally pay for our porno."

Makoto was silent, but Haru seemed to be considering the idea. "I guess I'll agree if it's underwater."

"Haru?!" Makoto looked like he was going to cry, and grabbed a pillow, burying his face in it.

"Underwater porn?" Rin made a face. "We'd have to wear goggles, and that would kind of kill it."

"We'd be more versatile with positions though," Haru pointed out. "There's a lot more you can do in the water that's physically impossible on a bed."

"But we can't even hold our breaths for that long, and none of us finish _that _quickly."

"But I want to wear a mermaid tail."

"If you wore a fucking mermaid tail, how the hell would you be giving or receiving any sort of banging?!"

"…that's true. Inside a pool then."

"I don't mind if it's a pool of cherry blossoms…"

Makoto, who had been watching the casual exchange between Rin and Haru with a look of growing horror, finally burst out: "What is _wrong _with you both?! You can't be serious?"

"Serious about what, Makoto?" Haru asked, straight-faced.

"We're not making a fucking porno!" Makoto cried, and Rin and Haru both stared at him, and then at one another, Rin's facing morphing into delight.

"Did Makoto just – "

"Use a swear word?" Haru looked awed.

"He _did_," Rin whispered reverently. "Wow."

"S-sorry!" Makoto blushed. "I didn't mean to sound so against the idea, I just really don't – "

"Say it again, Makoto."

"H-huh?"

"Swearing. Bad language. In that tone. Say it again." Rin grinned at Haru's command, but Makoto buried his face in his arms, with a mortified "Haru-chan!"

* * *

**the one where rin wants to race haru **

"Annngh! Nngh! I'm coming – holy fuck – holy _fuck _Haru – oh my god – I'm coming – Ha – _Haru!_" With a rough cry, Rin spilled into the boy beneath him, his hand still tight around Haru's throbbing cock, pumping.

"Oh my god, that was amazing," Rin gasped, panting for breath. "Haru – are you close?"

"Keep going."

"Do you like it?"

"Yeah."

"Do you want me to go faster?"

"You're fine."

Haru's fingers closed around Rin's, guiding him, and four minutes later, he spilled into Rin's hand. As they lay on the bed after cleaning up, Rin brought up the topic.

"You always finish last."

Haru turned his head on the pillow so that he was facing Rin, and raised an eyebrow in question. Rin ran his hand along Haru's hip. "When it's just me and Makoto, we always finish around the same time, if not together. But when it comes to you, even if it's all three of us, unless Makoto and I are ganging up on you, you almost always finish last."

"So?"

"Can't you, I don't know - make more of an effort?" Rin sounded slightly frustrated, and Haru, for the life of him, couldn't figure out why.

"Shouldn't I be telling _you _that?"

Rin glared at him. "I do try! It's just – you never fucking communicate!"

"Huh?"

"You never tell me when you like something, or if you want me to slow down or speed up, or be harder or be gentler. I'm not like Makoto, okay, I can't read you telepathically."

"How does it matter?"

"You're always finishing last, okay, and I feel bad!"

"First and last, who finishes when, timings..." Haru sighed. "I don't care about any of that."

"It's not a fucking _race_, Haru!"

"I know it's not. If it was, you wouldn't be so pissed off about coming first."

Rin pinched him, and Haru scowled. "Ouch. That hurt, Rin."

"You're completely missing the point!"

"What point?"

"It's not about who finishes when," Rin said angrily. "It's just – when I'm with Makoto, he always asks me what I want, and I tell him. And when I ask him, he tells me too. You're just so unresponsive and you're always finishing last and I'm worried that - well, maybe you're not enjoying it as much as I am." Rin's voice lsoftened, the anger dissipating from his face, and Haru was shocked.

"That's not it at all…"

"So then?" Rin looked anguished, and Haru yanked him forwards, kissing him hard.

"You're stupid," Haru informed him, and Rin bit down on his shoulder in response. "The reason I don't tell you what to do is because I like it when you do whatever it is that you want to do to me. I want you to do it the way _you _do it because that's _Rin's _way of doing things, and I don't want to change that. It's the same for Makoto."

Rin stared at him, weirdly touched, even though he wasn't quite sure if what Haru said was even meant to be touching.

"And I told you, I've never cared about speed, or timings, or anything. I just want to enjoy what I'm doing, and sometimes, it's more fun when it lasts longer…" Haru's lips quirked upwards. "So, any more things about our sex life that you're feeling insecure about?"

Rin stared at him, a little offended that Haru would ask him so frankly.

"What the fuck, Haru? Why do _I _need to be insecure?!"

"I don't get it either, but clearly you seem to think there are issues where there are none."

Rin ignored this, feeling a little stupid. "There is, well, one small thing…"

"What?"

"When I blow you… do my teeth…" Rin trailed off, looking at Haru meaningfully. Haru didn't get it.

"Do they what?"

"Do they – you know – hurt?"

"If you were really concerned, shouldn't you have asked me this about ten blowjobs ago?"

"Stop being a fucking ass, Haru, and answer the question!"

"No," Haru clarified, before blushing. "I actually kind of… enjoy your teeth."

Rin smirked, flashing said teeth in a blinding smile. "Is that so?"

Haru made a noncommittal noise, shrugging, though his blush had intensified. Rin rolled into an upright position and crawled on top of Haru.

"Get ready, Haru," he murmured, baring his teeth in a lascivious grin. "Because I'm about to blow your fucking brains out."

"What - Rin – wait – what are you – _oh…_" Haru let out a breathy little sigh, and when Makoto came back from the school (he had stayed back for a mandatory meeting about club funding which all captains and club presidents were required to attend) that's how he found them: Haru on the bed, his face flushed, gasping out Rin's name, his hands buried in Rin's maroon hair.

* * *

Haru pressed the stopwatch button, frowning. "Five minutes and twelve seconds."

"New record," Rin smirked, winking at Makoto before standing up and wiping his mouth.

A flushed Makoto scurried to the bathroom, shutting the door behind him so that he could clean himself in privacy.

"What was yours on him last time, Haru?" Rin taunted. "Five minutes and twenty? Thirty?"

"Five minutes and nineteen seconds," Haru corrected through gritted teeth.

"That settles it." Rin's smirk grew wider. "I get a gold medal for blowjobs."

"You haven't raced Makoto yet."

"That makes no fucking sense Haru, you can't expect Makoto to blow _himself_."

"He could, actually, if he surgically removed a few ribs."

"What's need for that when he has us, though."

"Guys!" Makoto had emerged from the bathroom, and he looked utterly embarrassed. "Rin, is it really necessary to _time _these things?"

"Absolutely," Rin said. "How else will Haru and I know who's the better blower. You're too goddamned diplomatic to tell us, so this is our only way of finding out."

"You're _both _incredible – " Makoto began, but it was Haru who cut him off.

"See. This is why we need the stopwatch."

"Yes, but why is it even a competition?" Makoto raked a hand through his hair and sat down on the bed, looking rather exasperated. "Haru you don't even _like _racing, or timings, or anything like that."

"That's when it's about swimming. This is different."

"But – but don't you want to just – be free?" Makoto was clearly getting desperate if he was employing that line of argument, Rin thought amusedly.

"I don't know why you're complaining," Haru shot back. "Do you think you have any reason to complain, Makoto?"

"I mean – it's not that I don't _enjoy _these things…"

"Exactly," Rin cut in, siding with Haru this time. "You benefit the most from our competitive natures. So I'd advise you to shut up."

In the meanwhile, Haru had kneeled down before Makoto and was working on undoing his jeans button.

"Ha-Haru – what are you doing?!" Makoto cried, flushing as he attempted to pull Haru's hands away. Haru responded by managing to pull down the zipper with just his teeth – an impressive technique which Rin had to admit, looked _ridiculously _sexy.

But then again, Haru had always been the quickest, most talented and most creative of the three of them when it came to taking clothes off, whether they be his own, or Makoto's or Rin's. Rin attributed it to the longtime skill Haru had developed, of instantaneously undressing whenever he caught sight of a sufficiently large body of water. Stripping was probably an instinctive and involuntary action for him, so it was no wonder that he was so good at it.

"Haru – no – not so soon – " Makoto was begging. "Rin just did – I can't – "

"Just relax, Makoto," Haru told him, standing back up and placing his hands on Makoto's shoulders. He looked at Makoto straight in the eye, his voice impossibly husky. "Because I'm about to blow your brains out."

"Oi!" Rin shouted. "Don't steal my fucking lines and use them on him!" He wouldn't admit that the way Haru said it was downright _orgasmic_, no way in hell, not when they were competing.

Makoto was staring at Haru dumbstruck, though his glazed eyes indicated that he was very, _very_ much turned on by what Haru had just said.

"Just you wait, Rin," Haru murmured, turning his head so that he could meet Rin's eyes as he took Makoto into his mouth. "I'll make him come in under five minutes this time."

* * *

**the end**

* * *

_Author's Note: I could have literally gone on forever with that, if it wasn't ridiculously long enough already. I still need to write some of the 'missing scenes' such as 'the one where makoto got pissed off', but I'm out of time at the moment. _

_Please review and let me know what you think! Should I continue with this and make more of these (probably shorter though haha)?_

_Thanks for reading, and see you next water time! =D _


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